Sprout is on Fall Break and where am I? I'm at work. FarmBoy and I took a week in January and went to Jamaica with some other farm couples. It was the first time since Sprout came along that we went on a trip without her. We needed the couple time and it was wonderful, but that means that my vacation time was eaten up. I'm lucky I have been at the same company long enough to have 4 weeks of vacation time. Usually I have a week for fair, 2 weeks at Christmas ( Sprout requests this every year) and then I have one week I divide up between spring and fall break and illnesses where she can't go to school. It's been hard to not be able to plan something for her especially when so many of her friends are doing something. It doesn't have to be a full blown trip to the beach, but something. FarmBoy is on shift today and then in the fields the rest of the week. He's promised to teach her to run the combine so at least there is that.
I still feel the guilt of being at work and not with her. I'm making time in the evenings to do special things, but it's not the same and I know it. I'm trying to be patient and wait on the lord for me to quit my job and find something part time when she's in school so that I have more flexibility. She doesn't say much about it, but I know she loves having me at home teaching her new things. It seems like there is so much to teach her these days. Our house is almost paid off and once we don't have tuition payments then I don't need to make so much money. It's just really hard because I know that she's growing up so fast and I know I won't get this kind of time with her again. I also know we need to have the house paid off so that all we have is a land payment or the farm just can't survive. I'm working on cutting back on what we spend and over this next year I'm going to get even more frugal to start preparing for the time when I just can't spend. My biggest issue is spending on Sprout. She's not quite done growing so clothes get expensive and I can't always get things at second hand stores anymore. I know the social pressures that can come with the wardrobe and I'm trying to figure out what I need to do so that will be a big exploration in the next year, but for now I'm off to get her from the sitter so we can do each other's nails tonight and watch movies.
Hi, I'm visiting from the Wise Woman link-up. Yours is the link before mine. I can only imagine how much it pains you to be at work and not at home with your sweet girl. I pray that the Lord opens a door for you to cut back at your workplace very soon.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Patti @ This Beautiful Life
Thanks for hopping over. I'm praying and working through it. We are slowly getting ready for me to transition and I'm trying to figure out what my part time gig will be. We need a little of what I bring in, but not much so I can temp work, etc. I'm just not sure what will be the best fit.
DeleteIt sounds to me like you are doing a fabulous job. It is always nice to be home with the kids but if God has for you to work right now than rest in your obedience! I know working moms who don't take the time for nail painting and movie nights with their kiddos... investing in her like you are really is more than enough. I pray you can have peace in knowing you are doing the best you can with what you have and she will notice, she does appreciate more than you can ever know.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the encouragement. I'm trying to be obedient I just have my pity days. She's great kid and I'm lucky to have her. Glow in the dark nails are the thing for Halloween I'm told.
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